Grace

Imagine waking up one morning without burdens, without a heavy heart, without weight on your shoulders, or devious thoughts racing through your head.

Imagine going a day without feeling guilt or resentment; your past not haunting you, the grey cloud above you vanished. No more fighting to suppress your fears and anxieties, no more failed attempts to quiet the sick voice in your head feeding negative thoughts into a vulnerable and damaged mind. No more shape shifting into someone you're not, no more giving up, no more hopelessness. You're not trapped in paralytic conviction.

Imagine waking up and everything feels different. Good different. Feels new, almost, except everything is how you left it. You feel refreshed and clean, like when you wake up from a much needed sleep to crisp air and the sun shining, not like you just woke up from an accidental nap in a state of panic and confusion.

Like finally you're free; the shackles are broken, the weight has been lifted. Your armor can be put down. You don't feel alone and you feel like you can actually, finally handle things. All of a sudden you realize all of the innate capabilities you were born with. They're not new, but it feels like it. You've had them all along.

Imagine waking up everyday like this. Refreshed and ready to conquer. Your slate is clean. It's a new day.

That's what grace does.

Christ showed us grace by dying on the cross, His blood used to wash away our sins day after day after day for all of eternity. It's like each day we, mere humans, dirty our canvas with sin and burden and regret and shame and worry and all sorts of stains we think are too rich to get out, and Christ stands ready to scrub and scrub until all is gone and our canvas is restored. He knows how hard struggles may be and how severely things hurt and how truly we ache, but He showed us His unfaltering determination and perseverance through His faultless life enduring strife and pain.

What defeats us, He already defeated. What holds reign over us could never hold reign over Him.

Imagine waking up and realizing you're not alone, there is a meticulous and sovereign God ready and eager to take on your biggest burdens and overcome your fears, anxieties, and guilt. Your battle's already been won by the undefeated King.

Not to say you'll wake up fully refreshed with birds delicately landing on your shoulder singing sweet songs to wake you up. Things will still be how you left them. Conflicts may still need to be resolved, things might need to be fixed. It might take time. You'll hurt and you'll hurt often. But you won't ever be alone. You'll have a constant reminder that you are well equipped with the tools to combat all troubles of this world because He is in you and that's all you could ever need. Nothing can hold power to you because nothing can hold power to the right hand of God. Nothing can defeat you because it's not you fighting anymore. The one who created all into being from breath, who created man from dust, who diminished the sting from death, who rose again; He is fighting in your honor.

It doesn't mean that everything will be perfect, it just means that everything will be okay. For today, for tomorrow, and for the rest of eternity.

Things not to say in front of/to someone who has/has had an Eating Disorder

"I'm just going to go anorexic"
"I'm anorexic for this week/day/etc"
"I'll just make myself puke"
"I could never go anorexic, I like food too much"

There's a difference in having anorexic tendencies and being anorexic, between making yourself puke once and being bulimic, between not eating to fit into a dress and not eating. Don't get me wrong, all of those are harmful, but claiming you have an ED because all you've eaten in 48 hours has been an apple is like complaining about how OCD you are when realistically you just like all your pens facing the same way in a drawer or tend to put your keys consistently in the same place. It's up there with claiming you're depressed because you had bad day, or even worse, telling someone with depression that it'll get better or, that "tomorrow's a new day."
Odds are you don't know what it's like to feel like a failure when you take one bite, to feel awful when you throw it up, to feel even worse if you don't throw it up. There's no winning in this game, but you won't know that until you're certain you're losing and your mind is lying to you saying you're in last place but actually you're the only one playing.
You don't know what it's like to become dependent on the 10 diet pills and supplements you take daily until you forget to take some or decide to stop and get better and you're physiologically not who you were; you are unhappy and mundane, so you have no choice but to revert back to your pills. You don't understand what it really means to suffer until you find out you have permanent health issues, like weak, yellow teeth, and acid reflux that requires long term medication.
The real kick is when you try to stop, try to get better, try to stop taking the pills one by one, eating slightly more, going a day before you stick your fingers down your throat, but you miss something. You're not whole anymore. The scale you hid behind the shelf peaks out and you find yourself standing on it shaking and sobbing. There's really nothing like realizing you've found comfort kneeling in front of the toilet and saving up to buy more pills and feeling empty. At this point, you may even be okay with how your body looks but you can't escape this lifestyle, it's who you are now. When you're lonely and stressed, angry or bored, your eating disorder will always be there to comfort you and there to celebrate with you when you're happy, rejoice with you when you're in love; a reliable acquaintance.
So just be cautious what you say, because it may be the reminder to someone that opens the door to their un-welcomed guest.